The Gym is for Everybody

Photo by Steve and Jemma Copley via Flickr

The gym is a fascinating place where all kinds of people come to show off their eccentricity.  From neon spandex shorts to t-shirts with the arms ripped off and workout clothes that are anything but workout clothes, people love to show off the latest fashions while working out at the gym. In a simple pair of Adidas running shorts and moisture wicking t-shirt I feel under-dressed.  I suppose my problem is that I try to avoid attracting too much attention at the gym while these fashionistas obviously want all eyes on them. 

Last week I saw a middle aged woman walking on the treadmill wearing an outfit that was the complete opposite of workout gear.  She had on a t-shirt (no problem so far), flannel shirt, ankle-length flannel skirt, white socks, and black loafers.  I didn't see the moment that the incident occurred but I knew something had happened when I saw people running into the ladies section of the gym and a little while later they came out supporting the flannel lady and leading her to a chair.  I can only imagine that she either tripped on her skirt or non-athletic shoes or she passed out.  After all, flannel is not moisture wicking. 

Today I saw a man wearing what I can only describe as a Crocodile Dundee necklace.  I would think something like that would be a safety hazard while exercising but apparently he was not afraid that his jugular may be pierced by his pointy necklace.  I also saw a man wearing the shirt he had apparently been wearing when he was attacked by a bear.  There was hardly enough material left to constitute a shirt, but I suppose something like that is a sort of trophy that you want to show off.

Look at me I'm high vis!

Looking cool doesn't mean you always have to dress like Bozo the Clown's personal trainer (isn't that Carrot Top?).  Another of today's sightings was a female in her 30s who chose a treadmill next to the wall mirror so that she could watch herself walk.  Every few seconds she was checking herself out.  Apparently she liked what she saw because she kept looking.  My main fear was that she would become more preoccupied with looking at herself than walking and end up falling headfirst into the treadmill.  This regrettably didn't happen.

I can't make fun of the self motivators though.....but I will.  Working out on the elliptical while listening to your music so loudly that you don't realize that half the time you're singing along and the other half of the time you're just uttering non-nonsensical words takes a lot of courage.  Add to that the moments of clapping or punching thin air and you've got a recipe for an extremely motivated person who needs no physical trainer to keep them in line.  It's true I've done my fair share of humming or muttering a mantra to myself while running OUTSIDE.  Doing stuff like that in a gym is alright as long as you don't mind attracting a lot of attention.  At least you can be certain no one will try to mug her in the parking lot afterward because she's sure to go ape-shit on somebody.

Photo by Cimm via Flickr

Zumba allows you to punch air and dress cool!